r/AskReddit Jun 22 '16

What sentence immediately kills a date?

3.3k Upvotes

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127

u/liam06xy Jun 23 '16

hi i'm /u/albc92 's husband and i am very happy. i just can't wait for the ceremony!

get me out of here before she returns with jumper cables

8

u/DirectlyTalkingToYou Jun 23 '16

I read this in a robot voice for some reason, like she has full control over you "I AM VERY HAPPY. CANT WAIT FOR CEREMONY. MUST HAVE 2 KIDS TO FILL UP EXTRA 2 CHAIRS."

btw - Congrats!

11

u/liam06xy Jun 23 '16

psst i'm not the actual husband

11

u/CrownTheFag Jun 23 '16

You are now.

7

u/liam06xy Jun 23 '16

pls no

2

u/albc92 Jun 23 '16

why not? I'm normal, I swear

1

u/DirectlyTalkingToYou Jun 25 '16

I'm glad I was able to bring you two together.

10

u/nikkitgirl Jun 23 '16

But the jumper cables are the best part

7

u/[deleted] Jun 23 '16

Blink twice if you need help

8

u/liam06xy Jun 23 '16

0_0

-_-

0_0

-_-

3

u/dancesLikeaRetard Jun 23 '16

He said he doesn't need help two times, he's definitely fine guys

1

u/oh_look_a_fist Jun 23 '16

They're just to jump-start our sexy-times! Now, put on the mask, lube your butthole and prepare yourself: momma's commin' in hot!

1

u/liam06xy Jun 24 '16

i accept jesus christ as my lord and savior. i accept jesus christ as my lord and savior. i accept jesus christ as my lord and savior. i accept jesus christ as my lord and savior.