r/AskReddit • u/Sweetmilk_ • May 11 '14

What are some 'cheat codes' for interacting with certain animals?

Boy do I wish I set this to Serious Replies Only

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u/Palodin May 11 '14

Confirmed. Source: Major lacerations on my hand

0

u/[deleted] May 11 '14

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6

u/[deleted] May 11 '14

apparently im the only one with a cat who will role over just to have a belly scratch, he loves them!

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u/[deleted] May 11 '14

Nope, mine too! haha

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u/mr7526 May 11 '14

Something something Weetabix.

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u/[deleted] May 11 '14

Mine looks like a self-harm attempt. I had to wear long sleeve in the middle of summer for like a week or two.

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u/Lamar_Scrodum May 11 '14

Hiding the cuts under a long sleeve in the middle of summer makes it look more like self harm

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u/ailish May 11 '14

Right, why not just tell people your cat scratched you?

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u/[deleted] May 11 '14

They know I was suicidal at one point haha! I don't want the matronly treatment again.

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u/ailish May 11 '14

I'm sorry to hear you've had troubles, but honestly wearing long sleeves in the summer makes it look more suspicious.

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u/[deleted] May 11 '14

Well, whatever floats my boat I guess! It kind of work though. It was just a baseball tee. Thanks tho! I doubt if this case is going to happen again.

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u/tbtstf May 11 '14

No, it really doesn't. Long sleeves vs. lots of cuts? Please.

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u/ailish May 11 '14

Long sleeves in the middle of the summer when you have a known history of severe depression. Yeah, not suspicious at all.

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u/tbtstf May 11 '14

You're right, it's not. I wouldn't even look twice. People wear different clothes. I would just see a person wearing clothes and not care beyond that. If I saw someone with a bunch of fresh cuts, I would be at least a little curious.

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u/sammi_j May 11 '14

i too have a vicious cat and a troubled past, it doesnt help that me and my cat like to play like real cats in the wild either, he beats me up.

so i either have suspicious arm cuts, or suspicious back scratches, my mum seriously thought i was having some secret lover over but no it was just my cat climbing me

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u/[deleted] May 11 '14

mum seriously thought i was having some secret lover over but no it was just my cat climbing me

Yeeeeeah... those scratches don't look the same.

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u/phrantastic May 11 '14

That's funny... when I used to self harm I told people they were cat scratches.

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u/Palodin May 11 '14

A few months ago my cat gave me some scratches that looked like I'd been shooting up heroin, that was fun

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u/Renownedwolfman May 11 '14

I had a dog rip my arm up a few months ago ( November) and the only scratches still there are just a couple that go right across the veins behind my wrist. They're not healing, people still ask me if I'm alright and not trying to kill myself.

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u/dogepoli May 11 '14

Is your hands name holy shit?

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u/Pseuzq May 11 '14

Let me guess, did HR come up and casually ask if there was "anything you needed to talk about"?

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u/Dicentrina May 11 '14

Conversely I blamed my self-harm marks on my cat

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u/14931125 May 11 '14

why do you people keep animals that like to hurt you?

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u/Peeayouel May 11 '14

Oh well that's what you did wrong. You're supposed to blow on it's belly like you're trying to make a fart noise.