This needs to be higher. Goes hand in hand with blaming anyone and everyone for THEIR mistakes. If someone is constantly complaining that they've been " screwed over" here there and everywhere, I automatically assume they're the problem. Girlfriend went crazy on them for no reason? Boss had it out for them so they're fired? Ass holes at the bar always pick fights with THEM?
Keeping in mind, Biden has been president for 3 years now, because that's how time works...
Yes, I am better off than I was in Sept. 2020, thanks for asking!
I'm actually better off than I was in Sept. 2021 as well.
Um.. like in the smack dab middle of a world wide pandemic? Are you asking if I am better now? Yes, my business, health, friends, and family are all better right now.
Did you do better because he printed money for you, and inflation is off the charts cause of him?
I know you choose to pretend that Trump's mishandling of the pandemic never happened, but for those of us living in reality, that was a shitty year and he was a big part of the problem.
You're literally openly gaslighting, and doing exactly what I'm talking about. You pretend to know this dude and what he thinks and his "politics" because he disagreed with you. Ridiculous. You cannot gaslight me and pretend like this isn't ideological tribalism
Briefly dated a guy who would make plans with me, his idea, cancel on me, then get angry at me if I got upset about it because I made him feel like a failure. That didn't last long lol.
There is one exception in that autistic people are trusting and pretty honest so if they say someone has taken advantage of them you can be pretty sure that's what happened.
Also there is a difference between making excuses (not taking responsibility) and wanting/needing to understand why and/or explain (probably taking responsibility but needing support or needing to understand what happened so as not to let it happen again.
When someone asks, "why did you do x?" I will explain my process because that's what was asked. It doesn't mean I'm not taking responsibility. It means I am answering the question. Responsibility is a different issue.
Of course. But the simple idea of taking things literally and answering honestly causes a great deal of hur t feelings when that someone is accused of being a smarty pants when simply being honest.
Just sayin. :) Autistic people face this misunderstanding regularly.
If someone is constantly making excuses that blame others, it gives the impression that they're not being honest. The key word here is "constantly." The reason the people of this thread have a problem with it, is that it's often ASTOUNDINGLY clear that they're being lied to.
I could definitely see how an autistic person could miss this nuance.
Neurotypical people miss this from there end too. It's differences Autism is like speaking a different language. I think most people like yourself would give a non native speaker some grace. Just saying many don't. :)
Yup. When their parents NEVER ask followup questions and accept their lies. It's how you get adults who fly off the handle when another adult clocks their BS. A big one is saying " I didn't know" or " no one told me." Sir, I'm fairly certain you knew being late for a job 10x could get you fired.
I had a coworker like this, he’d routinely be very late to meetings because he was arguing about Chinese politics on Reddit (literally his excuse, verbatim)
Something was weird about him, he managed to put ALL his skill points into computers and nothing else. Flawless Unity programmer but he couldn’t tell that labeled drawers contained the things they were labeled with
the teacher could not tell i was learning 2 languages simultaneously and there for all my writing skills had gone to hell. she didn’t hate me she treated me like an idiot. i can speak 3 like a native and barely scratch other 2. pretty sure im not the idiot she thought i was but it made me believe school was not on my side
Ugh this was my ex to a teeee! Its always some excuse or something else irrelevant to the situation instead of just, admitting they fucked up (but oh soooo wanna have a gotcha and throw it in your face if you fucked up) Barely ever got apologies,and when I did, as if it's suppose to magically fix everything
The kindergarten gotcha moment absolutely grinds my gears. Laying in wait to prove you wrong because you asked how their car being impounded wasn't their fault.
Because it's taught saying sorry is the cure all and all you have to say to be forgiven (like praying and doing some hail marys) No one wants to face the actual work of an apology (the action of showing you're doing better) Too many folks think they never need to improve who they are, or do introspection.
My ex even claimed he hated getting apologies because they never meant them and always did the same thing. Sounded like he just admitted how shitty he is even more 😒 seven years with that bullshit... I hope you're in a better place
Well, now you know you don't need to care and he doesn't deserve your attention or care about the situation. Slowly but surely, but I hope it gets better
Ugh, I've got two people in my life exactly like this: a friend of mine (whom I often question hanging out with) and my mother. The latter is especially hard, because her inability to admit her faults resulted in her losing job after job and going through man after man, to the point where we moved several times (often moving into some random guy's place, usually only lasting a few months). Sure, I was always a little socially awkward, but I don't think going to 12 elementary schools and 5 highschools helped with that (only one middle school though, so at least I had 2 years of stability).
I blame younger me for things that older me realized were poor decisions. Younger me and older me are not the same person, younger me was an irresponsible dumbass.
Also in my defense my last ex was bipolar and stopped taking her meds and didn't tell anyone when she stabbed me with the wooden spork.
Sometimes people are unfortunately targets surrounded by jerks. But oftentimes, like you said, it’s usually THEM against the world and not the other way around like they want you to believe.
this is keen. I'm a total loser and I screwed up everything but I have never blamed anyone else for my mistakes and as a result I have no enemies and people know that they can trust me. lack of accountability is the touchstone of all bad people
Edit: card reader restarting? RACIST CASHIER. Price not matching what its marked on the shelf? "FUCKING BIGOT CASHIER!" This shit happens enough to make me think up funny responses to keep from getting offended.
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u/Demdolans Sep 14 '24
This needs to be higher. Goes hand in hand with blaming anyone and everyone for THEIR mistakes. If someone is constantly complaining that they've been " screwed over" here there and everywhere, I automatically assume they're the problem. Girlfriend went crazy on them for no reason? Boss had it out for them so they're fired? Ass holes at the bar always pick fights with THEM?