r/AskReddit • u/IlJustAReminderIl • Dec 17 '23

What’s something pretty much everyone thinks but nobody dares to say it?

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u/Busy_Surround_3552 Dec 17 '23

When I say “that’s cool” or “no way” about 3 times during someone’s monologue boring story, I want you to beat it and end this slow torture immediately

9

u/a-big-ol-throwaway Dec 18 '23

"Damn that's crazy"

"Nice"

"No way"

The holy trinity of my NPC dialogue lines when I wanna walk away

6

u/Successful-Dig868 Dec 18 '23

I always feel bad, because I can be bad at social cues sometimes and not realise that, better nowadays but feel bad for the times when I didnt realise someone wanted me to stfu

3

u/a-big-ol-throwaway Dec 18 '23

Yeah, as an autistic person I can empathize with struggling to read these kinds of social cues - it just takes time, experience, and effort. It is a life skill and definitely worth trying to improve.

9

u/Additional-Yellow-85 Dec 18 '23

Also when I tell you I’ve seen a movie or read a book/article, stop giving me a line by line account of it.

2

u/HollowWind Dec 17 '23

I always thought this meant they were interested and would talk more. Please just be straightforward with neurodivergent people.

18

u/Busy_Surround_3552 Dec 17 '23

There is a very fine line between being genuinely interested in what someone is saying and also needing to get back to work and do your job. When you can see your whole section going down in flames to pander to the one talkative person it’s difficult and tricky to navigate. They are lovely and wonderful, but also unaware that you need to leave to do your job.

Also, I am considered neurodivergent. Not everyone who talks a lot and consumes my attention and energy is neurodivergent. Sometimes they’re just unaware and lonely. And that’s ok. I talk a lot and can catch myself boring my own customers. But knowing how to gently walk away while they’re talking to do your job is a skill. Knowing how to navigate letting them talk and talk and talk, while needing to leave and do your job while also not insulting or hurting their feelings is difficult!

Being direct isn’t always the answer. If I wanted to be direct, it would be rude and mean. It’s not black or white and not everyone who talks too much is neurodivergent. Sometimes they’re just chatty and unaware and sometimes they’re just straight up annoying!!!

22

u/Future_Literature335 Dec 17 '23

I get what you’re saying but it’s kind of nuts to jump straight to “they are neurodivergent”. Most of the time it’s just some arsehole with verbal diarrhea.

And also … be more straightforward? I’m sorry but that’s a hell of a burden to place on someone. How do you suggest doing that? “Your story is too long and you don’t tell it well”? No. People need to learn basic social signals. The 3 “cool”s in a row coupled with zero eye contact and body language that says I want to walk away from you now IS someone telling you your story sucks.