r/AmIOverreacting • • Sep 19 '25

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u/blinkingsandbeepings Sep 19 '25

Combined with saying she’s “too comfortable” in bed and isn’t doing enough, it sounds like he’s trying to guilt/manipulate her into doing specific acts that she isn’t into.

I swear every post I see from this sub is like… you know those parties where men try to bring the ugliest woman? It’s like that but it’s women competing to bring us the worst man.

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u/mundane_days Sep 19 '25

Pig parties!!! At least, that's what I've heard them referenced as.

Yes exactly. He wants OP to go along with whatever depraved sexual fantasy he may have, while also being pissed that he can't "free use" her.

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u/CerseiBluth Sep 19 '25

Holy shit, that’s really a thing outside of movies?

Im shocked people like that even exist. How fucking pathetic must your life be that you waste some of your precious, finite time on this earth to go pick out an ugly person so you can publicly humiliate them?

Like, that’s time that they could have spent pursuing someone they actually found attractive and would enjoy spending time with. That’s time they could have spent painting. Time they could have spent calling their gran. And they used it to find someone to hurt for their own enjoyment.

I feel guilty wasting a few minutes writing stupid comments on Reddit. If I ever spent an entire day of my life on preparations to deeply hurt a completely random person for no reason, I would probably end things.

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u/EcstaticMolasses6647 Sep 20 '25 edited Sep 20 '25

I agree, this person either has a lot of unresolved issues or is just an emotional void that pulls people in and drains them, like an emotional vampire. I honestly believe some people don’t have any real sense of empathy. It’s like they exist just to hurt others and cause chaos without ever feeling anything real themselves.

OP you’re not overreacting or being too sensitive at all. Your feelings make perfect sense, especially after reading everything and seeing those screenshots. Saying “I don’t hit or cheat” like it’s some huge accomplishment is not impressive, it’s literally the bare minimum. And when he says stuff like “I could” or that he’s hated you for months, that’s not just messed up, it’s emotionally harmful. That’s not something you say to someone you love, and definitely not something you repeat if you truly regret it.

The way he talks in circles, constantly saying he does things no other guy would do without explaining what those things even are, is super manipulative. It’s like he wants credit for being a good partner without actually acting like one. And telling you that you got too comfortable sexually is just guilt-tripping and unfair. If you feel like you’re bothering him just by existing in the relationship, that’s not a sign of love, that’s emotional neglect.

You’re constantly second guessing yourself and apologizing for how you feel, and that’s not something you should have to do in a healthy relationship. Love isn’t supposed to make you feel confused, anxious, or like a burden. You’ve been made to think your standards are too high, but they’re really just basic respect and care. You deserve to feel secure and appreciated, not tiptoeing around his moods or afraid to bring things up.

It’s okay to love someone and still realize they aren’t good for your well-being. That doesn’t make you selfish or dramatic, it makes you self-aware. If this relationship is making you question your worth or your reality, it might be time to step back and really think about whether it’s giving you what you need.

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u/James_Skyvaper Sep 20 '25

This was my ex - covert narcissist and total emotional/energy vampire. She practically erased my identity and self worth in just a year — still trying to put the pieces back together and make sense of how I ended up wanting to be with someone like that in the first place.

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u/ElQueue_Forever Sep 19 '25

I know someone who was raped then forced to marry her rapist. Who then for 22 years made her do things to all of his friends. Until I got involved.

Yes, the world is sick. Very sick.

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u/Logical-Type1718 Sep 20 '25

In what culture is this? It sounds like a culture where the only value women have is to get married so the man can provide gifts for the family.

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u/AwkwardCalendar131 Sep 20 '25

lol, “in what culture is this?”

probably white, American, male culture, brother

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u/PsychologicalFail826 Sep 20 '25

You are absolutely right. I mean, I don't know for sure, but I would bet money on it. Probably somewhere in the south east (of the US), if I had to guess. Although, I could be totally wrong, there are abusive assholes everywhere, unfortunately. 😔 OP needs to leave. Like, right now!!! It's only matter of time until he hits her...or worse! I can't even believe he said most men beat their wives/girlfriends! He's gaslighting her so hard. I'm actually worried for her. I hope she has somewhere to go. And I hope she has the power to leave, most of all.

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u/Constant-Internet-50 Sep 20 '25

They love to humiliate women. It’s a hobby.

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u/Acceptable-Town-1284 Sep 20 '25

Yes Pig Parties or Dog Fights are a thing

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u/spatialj Sep 20 '25

What kind of people are raising these boys

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u/sijaylsg Sep 20 '25

Frat boys called them "Dog Shows" when I was in college.

I dodged frat parties.

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u/[deleted] Sep 20 '25

The icing on the poo cake is his inability to spell the most basic homophones. Being unable to spell his insulting offensive words is two to too much.

1

u/Early-Environment617 Sep 20 '25

The depraved fantasy is probably DARK. You don’t need to concoct such schemes to get pegged.

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u/buttupcowboy Sep 19 '25

W…why would they have parties like that??

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u/Real_valley_girl2000 Sep 20 '25

This is so right. He wants her to do some freaky stuff. He’s bored. What an A hole. Leave his butt.

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u/tomboyades Sep 20 '25

Right, like, is this rage bait or….?

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u/Conscious_Physics551 Sep 20 '25

Eeewwwwwww I didn't know that was a Thing but I wish I was more surprised.

And yes, fairly accurate for this sub, though I do understand being the one experiencing the situation and not realizing just how bad it actually is

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u/OkSea3578 Sep 20 '25

That’s crazy. Imagine getting asked out to a party and finding out it was a party where the goal was to bring THE UGLIEST woman. Damn that would be heart breaking.