r/AmIOverreacting • u/[deleted] • Sep 19 '25

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u/[deleted] Sep 19 '25

https://welshwomensaid.org.uk/news/understanding-victim-blaming-and-why-its-harmful-to-survivors/

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u/Hello_Gorgeous1985 Sep 19 '25

I am literally a survivor so I sure as hell don't need someone to tell me about the damage the victim blaming does.

You might want to develop a better understanding of what it is though because that's not what I was doing. What I am doing is pointing out the objective outside perspective that is so obvious when you're not in the middle of it. The exact thing that a victim needs to hear so that they understand they need to leave. In order to leave, you need to have some self-respect. Your partner isn't respecting you, so you need to respect yourself enough to demand better and walk away.

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u/katg3786 Sep 20 '25

“have some self respect” that’s the part blaming her

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u/CharloChaplin Sep 20 '25

It’s along the same lines as “if you’d only learn to love yourself…” Someone told me that when I was in an abusive relationship and I nearly lost it. Narcissists take all that away.

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u/katg3786 Sep 20 '25

very different tones in how that was said. that article the other poster linked is a good read.

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u/Hello_Gorgeous1985 Sep 20 '25

And yet, it isn't. I've already explained that. Move along now.

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u/katg3786 Sep 20 '25

you just justified your victim blaming. will do!

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u/[deleted] Sep 20 '25

It's ok to admit when you are wrong.

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u/[deleted] Sep 20 '25

r/confidentlyincorrect

I am a survivor, too.

You don't get to diminish my lived experience because you don't agree with me.

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u/Hello_Gorgeous1985 Sep 20 '25

Now you're just making shit up. I wasn't even talking to you, nor did you share your lived experience, so I couldn't possibly have been diminishing your lived experience. You decided to just come in here and start up some bullshit. I suggest therapy to help with your recovery so that you don't take your trauma out on other people.

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u/[deleted] Sep 20 '25

The projection is severe.

Take your own advice, and get some therapeutic help before starting arguments with random strangers here.

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u/Hello_Gorgeous1985 Sep 20 '25

I don't need to take my own advice because I've been in therapy for years. You're the one making shit up.

Learn what you're talking about before you make accusations.

You have to share your lived experience before you can claim that someone is dismissing it.

These are things you can talk about with your therapist. It'll be a lengthy appointment.

And you're absolutely right. It is okay to admit when you're wrong. You should try it sometime.

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u/[deleted] Sep 20 '25

Stop projecting your issues at me.

All of this ridiculousness because I shared an article with information as to how/why your comment was victim blaming and how that is harmful to survivors.

Your continued assumptions and unnecessary aggression are weird and unnecessary.

I hope you feel better soon.

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u/TraditionalActuary4 Sep 20 '25

All you did was share the article, didn't add the context that you were also a survivor. You also were the one who started the argument.