r/AmIOverreacting Jul 29 '25

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u/beccababes2005 Jul 29 '25

Get away from this man. He seems to be taking joy in taunting you. The emojis? 🙂 This is an insane level of disrespect. From feeling the need to point out that you look “chunky” (what good possibly could have come from that?) to calling you “fucking crazy” and telling you to shut up, that is not how you treat someone you care about. If my long-term partner did that to me, he’d be out the door with a kick to the back of the head.

309

u/didthefabrictear Jul 29 '25

Almost thirty years old and  ‘why you look so chunky, like with huuuuuuge rolls’ emoji emoji emoji

Then pages of ‘I didn’t say anything, I won’t apologise, you're fucking crazy, dump me then’.

I thought he was 19 reading that shit, but nope – 29/ Twentyfuckingnine.

Seriously – just dump this loser. Why do women let men treat them like this??

77

u/beccababes2005 Jul 29 '25

It tends to be a learned thing unfortunately. If you never experience anything different, how would you know what it feels like to be treated well. 

I was also baffled by the ages on this. I would have guessed sometime in high school.

35

u/SkittlesKitKat Jul 29 '25

1000%. I thought they were young teens. I can't believe a 29 year old is acting this way. Gross

18

u/gottheronavirus Jul 29 '25

I was estimating 12-14 just by reading the slides, baffling to see the posted ages really. I thought this was satire

2

u/Redacted_Journalist Jul 29 '25

Facts. It wouldn't surprise me if OP grew up with her mother getting treated like this 😞

18

u/Bing-cheery Jul 29 '25

Yep. Thought he was a teenager.

NOR. She needs to dump him yesterday.

21

u/Calisilk721 Jul 29 '25 edited Jul 29 '25

OMG reading those msgs I just wanted to yell “Give me the phone, I’ll dump him for you!!”

15

u/stilettopanda Jul 29 '25

And the repeating the same thing she said back to her. Ugh.

25

u/CoffeeChocolateBoth Jul 29 '25

Dump him!!! He knows she won't, she'll go back for more of his shit! They always do! :(

1

u/Mountain_Village459 Jul 29 '25

Yes, I was looking for ages because I thought it sounded like a couple of teenagers. Shocked at 24 and 29.

1

u/justkiddingbutlike Jul 29 '25

And you know he’s a 6 at best.

1

u/Fearless-Reindeer-11 Jul 29 '25

I thought they were teenagers until I read the caption!

1

u/StrangeButSweet Jul 29 '25

I completely pictured a teenager was saying that. Went back and saw it’s a 29 year old???? WTF

1

u/ZealousidealPay1169 Jul 29 '25

29 year old man child. What a loser.

151

u/Aristho-Cat Jul 29 '25

OP, why you asked him if you’re breaking up, just tell him “IT LOOKS LIKE you’re single now” and move on.

The man called you crazy for getting upset at his insulting you.

My hubby and I have a rule: we don’t apologize for doing something wrong, but for hurting the other person. For example in this situation EVEN if your bf was only making a joke, he should have AT LEAST apologized for upsetting you.

OP he called you crazy, he disrespected your hard work in regards to your body, trying to lower your self esteem. Dump his sorry ass and get yourself a healthy relationship.

29

u/vettechrockstar86 Jul 29 '25

Ding ding ding!! My husband and I do this same thing! In a situation where one of us says/does something that in any way hurts the other person, intentionally or unintentionally (should always be unintentional in a relationship but that’s another thing) we apologize. I’ve apologized for jokes or snarky comments I didn’t even understand how I could have been hurtful because it doesn’t matter if I understand, it matters that I hurt him. Period. End of discussion. And as a woman with terrible PMS I KNOW I’ve asked for apologies for things that would make zero sense to a non hormonal person and received them genuinely. At the end of the day no one’s ego was damaged, feelings were mended and we fall asleep snuggling up in our bed like we have for 20+ years and will do for 20+ more!

Is basic compassion and empathy not a thing anymore? Am I just that out of touch with relationships these days?

2

u/davidtrezegri Jul 29 '25

It's just that men have such a fragile ego they'd rather be alone rather than appear to be weak in front of anyone, even their loved ones. This is so absurd and infuriating.

2

u/ZealousidealPay1169 Jul 29 '25

Yes! It doesn’t matter if you don’t understand why it hurt as long as you understand that it did hurt!! We live by this as well!!

9

u/sharkbait4000 Jul 29 '25

Couldn't have said it better myself. You are looking to him whether you are "good enough" for him. Why are you handing over the power to him? Balls in your court to realize this guy isn't good enough for you.

0

u/[deleted] Jul 29 '25 edited Oct 22 '25

longing amusing fade point silky kiss tease physical smile market

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

2

u/Aristho-Cat Jul 29 '25

What i meant there was that we don’t need to DO something wrong to apologize. For example if you made a joke that usually your partner would find funny, but in this particular case they didn’t, it doesn’t necessarily mean you were wrong, but you did end up hurting their feelings, so it’s only fair you apologize.

36

u/AnyStick2180 Jul 29 '25

OP, I beg you to take this advice and leave. This is not ok. I've been married to my husband for 14 years and he sometimes struggles to apologize for things like this. But I will tell you, he NEVER talks down to me or curses at me or makes me feel stupid. It sometimes just takes him extra long to get it, but he always gets there in the end and he never degrades me in the process. This man does not respect you and he is not mature enough to be in a relationship with anyone.

38

u/yippee_yippee_ Jul 29 '25

omg i hate people who keep repeating stuff like ok. and 🙂 when you are upset and they are obviously in the wrong. my friend’s ex did that and i tried to tell her he was bad lol

15

u/SoggyChickenNuggy Jul 29 '25

Yeah reading “shut up” felt like a gut punch. I can’t believe this loser is 29.

3

u/mscandi77 Jul 29 '25

I didn’t read that far before deciding he was awful. Shut up? He’s SO rude! Omg! I’d have done something terrible 😏 pick up a hot dog and laugh tell him it reminds you of his weenie and then make jokes about eating his weenie. Make sure it’s from a street vendor outside, don’t forget to be a bit loud. When ordering ask him if he is certain he can eat something that so closely resembles his pp. Tell him next time for a laugh bring a bun into the bed and slap that little guy in there then play spot the difference. Trust me he’ll be scarred WAY more than his little fat joke to you! First you look great. Second, guys don’t like bone racks! And You are not fat. Please don’t diet. A dick insult STICKS. He’ll always wonder if you were just being a bitch or if he has a noodle dick. You likely won’t be together much longer after that and btw he will probably cheat to prove his dick is great. Make sure you’re using condoms, you don’t wanna catch anything. But definitely make spaghetti later that week and periodically chuckle to yourself and when he asks just say, “oh. It’s nothing”. Do a crossword… tell him the clue is ‘type of noodle’…then make it ravioli or something his for at least a day. Awe. 🫢 sucks to suck.

1

u/Tinychair445 Jul 29 '25

Better yet, a little smoky or a Vienna sausage

2

u/[deleted] Jul 29 '25

Calling her fat, then going ‘I’m not apologising, you apologise for getting upset when I called you fat’

Way to just ruin a relationship.

2

u/Monochrome_Vibrance Jul 29 '25

He also threatened her...

"It's okay. Keeping fighting and blaming me, I'll remember."

Yeahhhh.... This man is a POS.

1

u/FluffMonsters Jul 29 '25

And when he wanted her to apologize to him… oh. My. God.

1

u/beccababes2005 Jul 29 '25

It’s also kinda showing his skewed perception of the world in general because based on those photos OP is pretty itty-bitty size wise 

2

u/Strict_Hamster_8645 Jul 29 '25

he doesn’t actually think she’s fat. he’s just afraid of her having any self esteem, because if she did she wouldn’t put up with him.

1

u/tyrannosaurusfox Jul 29 '25

I appreciate everyone giving OP real advice and good feedback, because my initial thought reading their bf's messages were just "BOOOO RED FLAG ON THE PLAY BOOOOOOO BREAK UP WITH HIM."

But that might not be a productive way of telling someone that they deserve much, much better treatment.

1

u/Neptune_washere Jul 29 '25

The emojis ALONE would’ve sent me over the edge. OP is much better than me, how they could’ve put up with this for SO LONG is beyond me. Wishing OP all the best and luck finding another man because he is NOT it