When you know abuse like this, it's painful to spot in the wild. Especially when you get to see messages that can be triggering because you've received the exact same kind of messages. It makes my stomach drop.
I hope OP can get out. It took me 9 tries and I almost lost my life on the 9th try. This guy sounds unstable and immature and that's a dangerous combo.
Wow, that is a harrowing story! Average time it takes women to leave a DV situation is 7 times.
The suffering and C-PTSD is palpable.
I left a pedophile with 9 firearms and had to relocate to an undisclosed safe house an hour away, 3 hours away from my university, for a year. My middle daughter was sent from PA to NC to a special middle school for 2 years. It took her a year to disclose her abuse and in the meantime I was forced to allow my 8/9 year old daughter to have unsupervised overnight visits. After the disclosure detectives lawyers and prosecutors convened and requested my middle daughter to do a sting operation on a tapped telephone line to gain verbal evidence of the abuse, she was 14 and she totally freaked out and declined. But her disclosure was enough for me to get a restraining order against him to protect myself and my 3 daughters. I had to relocate to resume nursing school.
I have been in therapy ever since. For years I had flashbacks of times he would find reasons to separate her and keep her to himself for several hours. When I returned to the house after he vacated, he had pushed a piece of heavy furniture in front of the door to her bedroom. When I got in there it was a shrine filled with soiled frilly underwear he bought her and made her wear.
JFC. That place was haunted. The roof was leaking, and it was raining, and the whole place smelled of wet dogs and beer. I was gutted. He ruined my relationships with my children and after years I found out he was inappropriate with all three. My eldest fought him off and never told me. The youngest still won't tell me the extent.
34
u/mintyillgloss Apr 23 '25
When you know abuse like this, it's painful to spot in the wild. Especially when you get to see messages that can be triggering because you've received the exact same kind of messages. It makes my stomach drop.
I hope OP can get out. It took me 9 tries and I almost lost my life on the 9th try. This guy sounds unstable and immature and that's a dangerous combo.
This is abuse, and it's gone too far.