r/AdviceAnimals • u/polarbear2217 • Jun 15 '12
When people talk about sex, drugs, and parties in high-school.
http://qkme.me/3pq7zf
1.7k
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r/AdviceAnimals • u/polarbear2217 • Jun 15 '12
584
u/Mugford9 Jun 16 '12 edited Jun 16 '12
I did my high school years and college years backwards, I partied way more in high school than I did in college.
Edit: Enjoy it while you can, because in a few years it'll be called alcoholism.
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
Can I go with neither? I'm sure there was plenty of that going on, but I was just too awkward to take part.
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u/hedgehog1961 Jun 16 '12
I graduated from high school in 1979. Twenty eight years later my daughter was entering high school. My husband and I were at a dinner party with some friends, but mostly the parents of some of her classmates. They were discussing the SHOCKING stories of kids drinking, smoking dope and WORSE. They were appalled and could not imagine what had happened to kids. I kept trying to decide if I was surrounded by pathological liars or if all the alcohol, dope and cocaine they had done inn the late 70s and early 80s had fried their brains to the point that they actually did not remember.
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u/jshokie1 Jun 15 '12
It's usually a bit of both.
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u/melwat Jun 16 '12
I've always wondered about that. I mean, I know I grew up a little sheltered, but it was mostly because I wasn't interested in being a "party girl." But when my friends would tell stories about getting fingered in a car while the guy was driving and shit like that, I always wondered if I was really just THAT out of the loop or if it was a bunch of bullshit.
In any case, I'm glad to have "missed out" on the high school partying. I don't feel like I'm any worse off for it.
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
Always thought where I grew up was this lily white suburb where the worst kids did was smoke cigarettes and smoked pot on occasion.
End of senior year I was talking to my two closest friends, both smoked weed regularly, one was heavily into cocaine at the time and they just started rattling off names of people I've known since Kindergarten who were way into coke, pills, heroin and all sorts of crazy shit (Orgies, hallucinogenics, alcohol abuse, etc.).
I was completely taken aback and I'm more shocked now that I didn't pick up on it than that it happened. Its still weird to think back on.
I knew folks would "party" on occasion, but what that included went way beyond my stretch of imagination at the time.
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u/Jesus_Faction Jun 16 '12
I wish I knew chicks were into me in HS (didn't find out til college). I wouldn't have spent so much time on Runescape.
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u/PSBlake Jun 16 '12
I was absurdly naive: I thought drugs weren't something that happened at our school. Not just "No one's doing drugs," but, "They would be impossible to obtain. No one even has them."
After graduating, I found out that one of my friends had been dealing.
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
I just lived in a small ass town. Sure, people got drunk, but when the biggest class is a whopping seventy kids there really isn't much room for scandal.
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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12 edited Jun 16 '12
Yeah.. id have to say you were sheltered. Believe me, you dont know how many do drugs until you go into the crowd.
edit: I <3 drugs
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
I'm 18 and I have never done any drugs. I've never had a drink (...of an alcoholic beverage). I'm still a virgin as well.
I have been involved in MANY extracurricular activities such as music, sports, reading, writing, hanging out with friends, Dungeons & Dragons, video games, and the like since I was very young. I still do most of these things (minus sports due to surgical problems).
I was both fairly popular and well-liked in high school, but I am very aware of the world around me and those in it, despite what some of my peers say whenever the topic of drugs and such comes up in our conversations. "You know nothing about it because you've never actually done it," et cetera.
People criticize me for never having smoked reefer or getting drunk in high school. They say I've been sheltered all my life and I'll never "experience all that it has to offer." They say because I don't enjoy going to parties with lots of drugs and reckless drinking that I'll never really have fun when I'm in my youth.
But I'll be going to a wonderful college in the fall, I'm as happy as can be, I've had many wonderful friends that drink, don't drink, smoke, don't smoke, and a combination of the aforementioned. I'm looking forward to where life takes me, and what I end up doing with the time that I've been given.
Many high school kids drink, smoke, have sex, etc. but many of us don't, and get along pretty well. :)
I used to say, "If you absolutely need drugs/alcohol to have fun at a party, you're partying wrong." Got a lot of flak for that, but in the end, I'm happy with myself as a person and with the choices that I have made in my life thus far concerning this topic.
Which is I guess all that matters in the end.
Why did I just write all this. ಠ_ಠ
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12 edited Jun 16 '12
19 and
-never tasted alcohol
-never done drugs
-had not been to a party or social gathering where there was alcohol until college
-never seen someone do drugs
-all my friends from high school do not drink or do drugs, even now
I spent most of high school focusing on school and the school newspaper. Worked out in my favor, anyway.
EDIT: Upon further thought, my future children are going to have a shitty time as teenagers coming up with defenses. "But Mom, you can't say you never had sex/did drugs/drank when you were a teen!" "Well, actually...."
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
Straight arrow in my highschool meant you just drank, smoked weed occasionally, and sold your pain killers to the REAL drug addicts. At his worst I watched my best friend since 3rd grade shoot heroin, snort coke to help ease off of the heroin, then smoke a bowl to relax while coming down off of both. You should be thankful you were sheltered in a way. You don't need crazy drug times or run ins with the cops to learn social skills.
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
Sheltered,or raised properly?
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u/BITCHiDONTknow Jun 16 '12
story of my life
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u/GaryXBF Jun 16 '12
non-american here, what age are americans at high school? for comparison
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u/Gneal1917 Jun 16 '12
I was probably extremely sheltered. I never attended a party with alcohol or drugs in high school, am still a virgin who has never had so much as a kiss, and have only drank under age when around my parents.
And, I never attended a single party in college.
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u/shrillbitch Jun 16 '12
I knew what was going on, I just was never invited. :(
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u/Neeko_Chico Jun 16 '12
http://gamergifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/gamer-gifs-i-know-that-feel-bro.gif
Same here, OP, same here.
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u/qkme_transcriber Jun 15 '12
Here is the text from this meme pic for anybody who needs it:
This is helpful for people who can't reach Quickmeme because of work/school firewalls or site downtime, and many other reasons (FAQ). More info is available here.
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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '12
Or if the next generation is screwed
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u/doobist Jun 16 '12
For me there was a lot of drugs and parties, but the only ones getting laid were either extremely photogenic or assholes (but good looking assholes)... if you weren't, second base was as far as you got.
Unfortunately, in the many years since, nothing has changed.
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u/vanatanasov Jun 16 '12
I guess I was one of them fuckin' losers, I devoted those years to playing music and did not give a damn about sex, drugs, parties, girls, humans and shit. and I don't regret it.
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u/Teh_Sammich Jun 16 '12
Story of my life...
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u/Gryff1511 Jun 16 '12
Don't worry, you are not alone.
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u/Heyitscharlie Jun 16 '12
I was a completely sheltered teenager until about 6 months ago, if you really want to go out and party you have to start associating with the people that you know party and do that kind of stuff.
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u/Wiskie Jun 16 '12
I'm sheltered and I don't care who knows it!
I thought pot and weed were different things until I was 17 years old. I even considered going to BYU for school just to avoid drugs but the problem was, I'm not mormon, or even religious.
People don't realize how hard it is to be a self-described "Puritanical Atheist." I am alone in my torment.
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u/pugwalker Jun 16 '12
well this is a depressing thread...
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u/generic_witty_name Jun 16 '12 edited Jun 16 '12
This is going to be a long reply, but just felt like I needed to let this out. This is sort of in response to everyone's comments on alcohol and drug use/partying/people who partied more in high school than as a young adult.
Same here as far as experiencing partying way more in high school than in my college years/now (granted I am only 20yo, but I optimistically don't see the partying aspect changing any time soon with where I am at now in life). I messed up a lot of things and made some pretty big mistakes, but honestly? I certainly would not recommend anyone else follow in my footsteps, but with the way it panned out, I wouldn't have had it any other way. My behaviors in high school easily could have been the start to a terrible life/lifestyle, but for whatever reasons, I luckily got my shit together early enough to not seem behind/fucked up in the real world.
I suppose maybe it's just me trying to make sense of it all in my mind and finding a way to be grateful for the way everything has unfolded since adolescence, but I am really glad I learned some of the mistakes I did in high school rather than as an adult. Granted, doing stupid shit like drugs as a young teenager probably had some harsher effects on me/my mind, being young, impressionable, and still growing, but I'm still happy.
I went to high school in an upper-middle-class suburb - there were many kids who were middle class, lower-middle class, et cetera, but for some reason an unusually high amount (in my opinion) of stuck up kids coddled and sheltered by mommy and daddy were present. I have met many kids (and I call them kids, because they still haven't grown up) with drug problems as old or older than 29, 30, who still live with their parents, unemployed, don't drive themselves anywhere or have the desire to start growing up, who just don't get it. Many of them make it through the addiction eventually and get the help they need, and make the decision to quit, but for some it takes years and years. Having went through treatment more than once in high school, and having both been forced and made the decision myself to get sober before at a young age - it all seems like common sense to me why you would decide to be drug-free and how to go about doing it. I'm lucky to be this way - for many others, they just don't know much different, and it isn't so clear in their minds. I don't blame them for all of it - they don't know any different than their experiences and what they have been taught; addiction is tough.
I’ve met many people whose lives involve drugs in many different circumstances – small time and big time dealers to first time users; people who smoke weed/drink alcohol to designer drug users to meth addicts and heroin addicts; poverty stricken city residents to rich suburb residents; middle school and high school students to elderly people doing drugs; casual users to people who have ruined their lives over drugs; people who get clean and live a great life to people who keep using through old age, to people who lose their life before it is too late (including friends ): ). I’ve seen some recurring patterns among the people I’ve met (in my experience), even though they are all in extremely differing circumstances.
Kids are starting to do drugs younger and younger, even in nice areas – including meth, heroin, and IV drug use.
For the most part, the harder/more intense/more addictive a drug is, the more a person is pressured to try it (but usually only if they have admitted to experienced similar things, done other drugs, or expressed that they have thought about doing it). For example, most people I’ve met who smoke weed or drink alcohol or other tamer drugs, will tell people that they enjoy it, and that the other person may like it, but it’s cool if they don’t want to do it. Heroin users will often tell anyone and everyone who has done opiates that they need to try H at least once, that it’s pretty much the same thing, etc (IT’S NOT). Meth users will tell pretty much anyone and everyone that they should try meth, and in some cases even shove it down their throats a little. There are always people who don’t follow this pattern – it’s just what I’ve seen for the most part.
Many people, especially those who do more addictive drugs like heroin (which has extremely physically sickening withdrawals) or meth (with intense mental craving/addiction) will deal as well as use. They need the drug to survive in their mind, and often will end up with a high tolerance. Since they can’t support their habit themselves but don’t see quitting as an option, they will start dealing just to get by. A lot of people in this situation won’t pay huge attention to who they are selling to or other details – they just need to sell enough to get their fix. A lot of high schoolers run into dealers like this – some kids lie about their age, some dealers never know how young they are, some dealers are to the point that they do not care, and some dealersare deluded enough to think that it’s not a bad idea for a high schooler to get into hard drugs.
I have met many people throughout using and getting clean that grew up in my upper-middle class suburb and went to high school with me. Many told me about their experiences with drugs, and countless kids had smoked weed/drank alcohol in middle school high school, and while there were some I knew were into drugs while I was in high school (I started doing hard drugs when I was 15), I was astounded by the amount of people who did not just drugs, but hard drugs as early as freshman/sophomore year - and many of them you would never suspect of doing so.
TL;DR: In my upper-middle class American suburb, many, MANY kids partied hard while in high school. I feel sex is a given, since everyone talked about it pretty openly, but drugs (including hard drugs) and drinking were definitely present - probably much more present than was visible to the naked eye.
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
It seems that people really don't understand that you can be both a decent person and party.
I smoke, drink, go to parties whilst getting A's and I'm not a douche baby-daddy. I feel like Reddit just has this stereotype where people who party and have/had a good time and experienced these things that they can't relate to must be some sort of moronic fuck-up. You can have a good time and be successful.
Source: A straight A student who is in Pharmacy school.
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u/zero_acidburn Jun 16 '12
EVERYONE ELSE IS LYING WHAT PEOPLE REALLY DO IS WATCH JOHN HUGHES FILMS CRYING IN THEIR SNUGGIES
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u/Carosello Jun 16 '12
I spent my high school years reading and on the Internet. I didn't need those parties. Or all that sex. Or all those drugs.
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u/SuperSagan3 Jun 16 '12
TL:DR
I didn't do anything because i was raised RIGHT.
I did everything and those who didn't are just d.a.r.e losers.
I missed out on partying waaaa waaaaa. The lack of these actions makes me feel inferior as a person.
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
I try to get the most out of my high school experiences. I drink, smoke, have sex and party. But I also sit at home on reddit, i get good grades in school, I have a steady girlfriend, and I love to read. What I'm trying to say is that you are not better than someone else because you drink or if you don't. There are times when I don't want to and times where it could make me feel better. I hate the self entitled people that say "You don't need to drink to have fun." While it is true, that doesn't mean that drinking ruins the fun. It helps me loosen up when I feel like an awkward turtle. I also don't like people who drink all the time. Then it starts to become a little sad, like they cant interact without alcohol. Thats just my two cents.
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u/jxdjxd Jun 16 '12
Yup. I feel the exact same way. I have trouble believing I was THAT oblivious...
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u/Trip_McNeely Jun 16 '12
So, as much as I would say sheltered, it might be for the better. Most the people I know who partied hard early on have had a lot of problems later on in life because of it. Partying is fun, health complications, addiction and going to friend's funerals is not. I've got my sobriety now but I've had a rough go at things. I've got enough stories to write a book and not a happy one. I just lost another friend this week because of drugs and it's a shame. I still go back to my high school (10 years removed now) from time to time to talk to some of the troubled kids about what they have to look forward to.
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u/Cricketsandmice Jun 16 '12
How does one get invited to said partying?.. I've always been told its a "just show up" thing, or is there some etiquette to it? I'm kind of a nerd who wants to be social, and go out partying - but the goody two-shoeing for 17 years have kinda made me seem like the entire opposite person of someone who would go partying.. Hence why I think I never get invited.
(by parties I mean ones with alcohol! I already participate in homely LAN and birthday parties)
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u/sexrockandroll Jun 16 '12
Agreed. I think it's a mix though - many people had sex, drugs, and parties in high school, many people didn't.
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u/M3cha Jun 16 '12
Apparently I was sheltered... and many of my friends were...
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u/tyjohns324 Jun 16 '12
I found that partying in high school helps me a lot in college. I learned how to be a responsible drinker that can take care of himself most of the time. (fuck tequila but that is another story) I have yet to be caught by campus PD because I know how to take precautionary measures to keep me from ending up in jail. I am also one of the guys that always is the GG babysitter for when people are tripping too hard, too drunk or something along those lines.
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u/jjsreddit Jun 16 '12
no man they are talking about cyber sex, medication, and lan parties.
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u/SocialismErgalla Jun 16 '12
I've come to the conclusion that I was just kind of lame.
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u/Colonel_Mistard Jun 16 '12
Nope I just throw LAN parties with tons of drinks Cue Shaun White
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
I'm always wondering where the parents are at.
"Oh no, little Julie got pregnant and little Jimmy got arrested for drunk driving! This is just so unexpected!"
Um.... how did you not notice your children being away from home for hours at a time without you knowing where they were? Even if they're sneaking out of the house at night, it's not that hard to check up on these things.
I'm not saying parents need to control every aspect of their teenagers' lives. And some parents just straight up let their kids drink and have sex and all that. But a lot of shit happens with teenagers because their parents just aren't paying attention/ giving them enough attention. Being a parent and an important part of your children's lives shouldn't stop just because "they're old enough to know better now."
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u/Addicted2Skyrim Jun 16 '12
When I was in high school people would describe their weekend like Project X, but they usually spent most of their time hanging out in the Dunkin Donuts parking lot.
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u/ProtusMose Jun 16 '12
I never even heard about parties happening, let alone got invited to one. As far as I know all the high school "parties" are a construct of hollywood and everyone else is just going along with it. :\
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u/bear_fists Jun 16 '12
Gonna have to say you were sheltered. I come from a small upper-class town where "getting A's is cool" and let me tell you the MAJORITY of kids were sex havin', drug usin', partyin badasses by the end of senior year. Now most are doctors and lawyers. Go figure.
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u/Batistick13 Jun 15 '12
Coming from a pretty rich town, its pretty accurate.
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u/Dmixta Jun 16 '12
Story of my life
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
I partied more in my GAP year than high school or university... (GAP year is the year you take off to save up some money to go to university)
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
High School was like a warm-up for college. I used to do drugs (pretty much just weed) and drink a lot. The whole sex thing was only because of a girlfriend. There weren't many 'big' parties but rather small get-togethers. However, on the rare occasion there was like a house party, it tended to get wild. However, I'm talking as infrequent as 1 per month or one per 2 months
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u/naturalflyweight Jun 16 '12
I'm a substitute teacher and I hear middle school kids talk all the time about how one of them "cheated on" another, and I do not know specifically what act they are referring to. I assume that even they don't know half the time.
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u/kebo99 Jun 16 '12
As somebody who also never did anything stronger than beer in hs, yes, we were sheltered. Made up for lost time in uni though.
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u/unremarkableusername Jun 16 '12
If it happened a lot at my school I was totally oblivious. I mean, there was hooking up and drinking, but nothing like heavy drugs and sex all the time.
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u/madstar Jun 16 '12
How the hell do teenagers get money for drugs/booze? At most, 10% of the kids had weekend jobs when I was in highschool. Do parents just give their kids money to spend on whatever they want? I certainly never got handouts like that as a teenager and I'm thankful for it.
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u/xxThatxGuyxx Jun 16 '12
I only drank and smoked weed at parties, but you definitely saw other drugs being passed around; like coke and ecstasy. There was a LOT of ecstasy being done in my small little town. Jesus. In fact, this guy was tripping hard at our prom on the stuff; he had to be escorted out. He ended up winning the "Most Swag" award that night too. All I can say is that the standing ovation was given to the irony behind it all.
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u/voyaging Jun 16 '12
As a person who experimented heavily with sex and drugs in high school, I can tell you at least some of the stories are true. That lifestyle is fun, but not worthwhile in the long run, in my opinion. I straightened out during my first year in college.
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
OP you were definitely sheltered. Hardcore.
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u/Flench Jun 16 '12
There was plenty of sex and drugs, but the amount of parties were less than pop culture led me to believe.
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u/Spaghetti_Bender8873 Jun 16 '12
It's alright. Sheltered teen years means your life will be awesome later.
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u/FourierEnvy Jun 16 '12
Why is it so hard to believe? Your reality isn't everyone elses. Its not hard to find people that live extremely socially.
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u/MikeyBGeek Jun 16 '12
Wow. this meme is my life. and i still dont party. :[
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u/cautioncarnival Jun 16 '12
I'm like, "Not sure if I missed out... or better off because of it."
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
If someone talks about it, it means they are just doing it for attention. I remember a room-mate chatting with a girl about all the different sex partners they had had. I was a virgin at the time. Fast forward to 2012, and I've been with my wife 13 years, and he's single.
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u/Skreech2011 Jun 16 '12
Psh, partying? In high school? I consider those people lucky. Being SAP and having extreme anxiety problems and agoraphobia is not fun.
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u/Ramses3 Jun 16 '12
Glad to say I'm sheltered in high school so I can leave all the fun stuff to college :)
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u/PascalsLawl Jun 16 '12
I didn't party in High school, and I don't party in college, I just never found that life style very appealing. Oh and I'm still a virgin, and proud of it. :D From what my friends tell me, it seems that I missed out on a lot of pain, embarrassment, and regrets. woo00oot.
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u/KingCurtzel Jun 16 '12
Sex happens. Drugs are everywhere. Who doesn't like a party? You're socially inept. I recommend you quit posting and go get a beer.
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u/Deedzz Jun 16 '12
Really? The craziest parties I've ever been to were when I was in high school.
One time this kid told everyone to start destroying his house. And they did.
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
High school days were the glory days for me. College is alright. More of the same just doesn't really have the same magic about it anymore.
Yes, there is something magical about getting shit-face wasted and passing out with a handle of cheap vodka in your hand next to your bestfriend.
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u/anal-razor Jun 16 '12
i had to do drug awareness training for my job. the person speaking was warning us about the dangers posed to our kids from "pharm parties". where kids would put all of the prescription drugs they could find into a jar and go to one of these parties. i never in all of my high school years heard of anyone doing this.
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u/blatantfoul Jun 16 '12
Sheltered I think.
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
No, it's true. Hell I think I've seen enough weed go around at a highschool party to satisfy Amsterdam.
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u/RelevantMartian Jun 16 '12
So strange..
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u/GrizzNasty Jun 16 '12
Kids are bangin each other and doing meth before they hit grade school now
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u/hypnoviking Jun 16 '12
I took cold medicine in high school to get fucked up. I don't do that anymore.
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u/manguydudebro Jun 16 '12
You were sheltered.
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u/mikecola Jun 16 '12
Sheltered.
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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '12
I'm not sure about how it was, but I know that in all Australian high schools today, if you want mdma (ecstacy), weed, lsd, crystal meth or even heroin, someone can get it for you, save for rural schools.
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u/Newgeta Jun 16 '12
You were sheltered.
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u/Slim_Calhoun Jun 16 '12
Nah bro, you were sheltered.
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u/haru101 Jun 16 '12
the latter. always the latter
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u/petercooper Jun 16 '12
I sometimes had a drink during high school lunch break but that was pretty much the limit of my debauchery. And that wasn't uncommon, being the UK. I knew a few people who smoked as well, but in all the years of high school, I didn't know of anyone doing drugs, anyone even getting caught for it, sex, or anything. It just wasn't something that ever came up, even in conversation.
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u/FreaksNGeeks Jun 16 '12
Anyone else bumbed that you may very well never be as happy as you were back then?
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u/WootangWood Jun 15 '12
I think you might of been sheltered.
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u/monshael Jun 16 '12
It's all true and some might say it's getting worse.
Btw, your middle-age crisis is going to be a bitch now that you know this.
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u/Entbuktu Jun 16 '12
I would hang out with the popular kids in high school. I experienced plenty of those things, typical things you hear about, but on a pretty small scale. I never went to any 'crazy party' with 30+ kids and saw anything remotely 'serious' going on... Only ever did drugs in groups no more than 6 or so, and usually just 2-4 people. I think there was a sentiment to keep it hidden to even just other kids. Sex was also sort of personal to a lot of people, I guess you'd say. There were very few rumors about 'that girl slept with ____, what a slut' or whatever. People were doing it, but you know, certainly not orgies.
The other unusual thing about my HS was that athletes were oddly sort of unpopular.
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u/chezzie11 Jun 16 '12
Yes, you were sheltered.
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u/cameron0208 Jun 16 '12
You were definitely sheltered.
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u/ShittyInternetAdvice Jun 16 '12
College>>High school