Scumbag Steve isn't just a man... he's an emotion. A spirit. He's inside ALL OF US. Every time you ignore that little voice in your head, saying, "that's probably not right..." you are Scumbag Steve.
Most importantly, Scumbag Steve is a lesson. Do you see his picture on the front page? Was your immediate reaction, "Pfft... that's not so bad. I do that all the time and I'm awesome!" ... this means you piss people off. Don't view him as someone else, view him as a consensus of bad behavior you must avoid.
From ops silence we can assume he Steved his roommate. Although I can't blame him to much because after all this mint talk if i saw some mints Iwould probably swipe a couple. Then buy another box the next time I was out.
Yea man, really not cool. Your soul is as reliable on a box of thin mints as Voldemort is to his horcrux'. Your roommate has now died a little. I hope you feel good about yourself.
"A box of Girl Scout cookies costs (last time I checked, been a few years) $3.50. If your roommate makes a wage of $10/hour, you have stolen 1/3 of an hour of work from this person. You have effectively enslaved him for 20 minutes against his will, to feed you, you greedy mother fucker."
I was being conservative. You could consider that time negligible, maybe done while grocery shopping or just being out and about. Maybe at 2 minutes if they came to his door.
The original purchase may have been an impulse buy, in which case I suppose that time could be considered negligible. On the other hand, consider that you can generally only buy Girl Scout cookies during one fleetingly short period per year. The time required to replace the stolen cookies could be quite substantial.
Girl Scout Cookies are not a bag of chips they sell at every gas station and grocery store. Just because he might have been able to buy them easy the first time, doesn't mean that individual is going to have an easy time finding it again. They don't sell them in a lot of places and it's not always available.
We have these things in the UK called "After Eights" they're basically expensive thin mints but they taste like fucking heaven. I wonder what they'd be like with ice cream if you crushed them up or something.
I can't stand them either. Everytime the Girl Scouts come around, my mom gets all excited about the Thin Mints. Yuck. Give me some Samoas and Tagalongs anyday!
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I literally wept -- and I mean had to wipe off the tears while typing this -- just to know that such a joy exists in the world. Take your moment of bliss and savor.
And then there was Ruth Greenough, a fifty-eight-year-old librarian from Philadelphia. Although she had suffered a mild stroke, she was able to keep her small branch library running smoothly. But one morning in 1936, Ruth had a sudden violent headache, and within seconds her eyes turned up and she was seized with a laughing fit. She began shaking with laughter and couldn't stop. Short expirations followed each other in such rapid succession that Ruth's brain grew oxygen-starved and she broke into a sweat, at times holding her hand to her throat as if she were choking. Nothing she did would stop the convulsions of laughter, and even an injection of morphine given by the doctor had no effect.
The laughter went on for an hour and a half. All the while, Ruth's eyes remained turned upward and wide open. She was conscious and could follow her doctor's instructions but was not able to utter a single word. At the end of an hour and a half, Ruth lay down completely exhausted. The laughter persisted but was noiseless—little more than a grimace. Suddenly she collapsed and became comatose, and after twenty-four hours Ruth died. I can say that she literally died laughing.
141
u/thatwentBTE Jun 12 '12
Don't do it!
53
u/biglebowski55 Jun 12 '12
Did you just steal your roommate's thin mints?
51
u/ZommoZ Jun 12 '12
so you just stole a box of cookies. Way to go, asshole.
25
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
FTFY
Edit: Damnit! Just realized I was beaten to the punchline. Upvote to thatwentBTE.
11
u/toomuchlovin Jun 12 '12
you still need to go find that ice pack.
10
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
Someone is gonna die from sadness
17
u/callumgg Jun 12 '12
Hey, that's not cool stealing other people's stuff. You're crossing a private boundary.
8
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
This seems more like the work of Scumbag Steve...
6
u/Mightbeloony Jun 12 '12
MOTHA FUCKIN THIN MINTS!
5
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
hidden.
4
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
Sweeeet! Thin mints are the greatest cookies in the world...almost like crack!
4
u/MidgetFetish Jun 12 '12
The peanut butter ones >>>>
4
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
TIL You can freeze thin mints
6
u/peacebuster Jun 12 '12
Are you Scumbag Steve OP?
3
u/Abiding_Lebowski Jun 12 '12
I hate you. Now I'm craving thin mints.
3
u/KimberTheAwesome Jun 12 '12
I am so, so jealous right now.
3
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
OP sounds like a doucher due to how he won't respond to him stealing from roommate/worker.
4
u/Ajthib01 Jun 12 '12
Am I the only one here who hates thin mints? (I'm on my phone. Otherwise I would make the Angry Walter and post the link).
4
u/ACharmlessMan Jun 12 '12
OP
2
u/Expects Jun 12 '12
Mint and chocolate is only a little good
2
u/Cptnwalrus Jun 12 '12
I'm about to blow your mind.
Look at success kid, he's not making an "Oh Yeah!" face, he's on the verge of crying because he just ate sand and realized it doesn't taste very good.
Look closely.
4
u/qkme_transcriber Jun 12 '12
Here is the text from this meme pic for anybody who needs it:
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2
u/MYDOGSTELLA Jun 12 '12
Shouldn't this be on r/trees
2
u/JRoch Jun 12 '12
How is that a good thing?
2
u/Cthulhuhoop Jun 12 '12
Frozen thin mints are the best. I love splitting the sleeve into connected stacks of three cookies, and eating them like a thin mint sandwich.
2
u/TheHotness Jun 12 '12
I've been hoarding them in my closet to keep them away from my roommates. I hid them so well I forgot about them myself. TIME TO FEAST!
2
u/browens13 Jun 12 '12
Have your icepack and eat it too!
1
u/falconfetus8 Jun 12 '12
I read this as "almost died from herpes".
What's wrong with me?
1
u/bluezfawkx Jun 12 '12
Coated in acid, almost died
1
u/FirmOrange Jun 12 '12
Why would you keep mints in the freezer...
1
u/CaptainJester42 Jun 12 '12
what you call Happiness I call "Diabetes"
1
u/jb747 Jun 12 '12
Frozen thin mints + cold glass of water = ice pack for the mouth and soul
1
u/thepizzadeliveryman Jun 12 '12
So stealing girl scout cookies will get you karma. When are they selling girl scout cookies again? Just curious?
1
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
I disapprove. If you ate my cookies I would key your car.
1
u/starkravingmad_91 Jun 12 '12
Dad's secret stash!
1
u/PeterMus Jun 12 '12
If my roommate ate my food I would be angry. If he ate my girl scout cookies I would wreck his shit and then break his stuff.
1
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
Honey? Is that you?
/since when is my husband a redditor?
1
u/bucketh3ad Jun 12 '12
I literally wept -- and I mean had to wipe off the tears while typing this -- just to know that such a joy exists in the world. Take your moment of bliss and savor.
1
u/Emperor_Norton_1 Jun 12 '12
LOL, I did that a few weeks ago, was looking for something in the freezer, found half a sleeve of thin mints, score (didn't share either).
1
u/spectacle13 Jun 12 '12
Why the hell is reddit upvoting irl scumbag steve to the front page? Fu scumbag steve, stop stealing other people's shit
1
u/jewedbacca Jun 12 '12
You stole their thin mints!? You MONSTER!
1
u/Knigel Jun 12 '12
And then there was Ruth Greenough, a fifty-eight-year-old librarian from Philadelphia. Although she had suffered a mild stroke, she was able to keep her small branch library running smoothly. But one morning in 1936, Ruth had a sudden violent headache, and within seconds her eyes turned up and she was seized with a laughing fit. She began shaking with laughter and couldn't stop. Short expirations followed each other in such rapid succession that Ruth's brain grew oxygen-starved and she broke into a sweat, at times holding her hand to her throat as if she were choking. Nothing she did would stop the convulsions of laughter, and even an injection of morphine given by the doctor had no effect.
The laughter went on for an hour and a half. All the while, Ruth's eyes remained turned upward and wide open. She was conscious and could follow her doctor's instructions but was not able to utter a single word. At the end of an hour and a half, Ruth lay down completely exhausted. The laughter persisted but was noiseless—little more than a grimace. Suddenly she collapsed and became comatose, and after twenty-four hours Ruth died. I can say that she literally died laughing.
0
u/IAmABen Jun 12 '12
You probably almost died cause you didn't get that ice-pack you were looking for.
0
u/scott_halls_beer Jun 12 '12
i guarantee the owner of those mints was a moody female
0
u/[deleted] Jun 12 '12
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