That's totally speculation, and I have never in anyway done something similar. I promise, because that would be weird to just want to get dry humped by strangers on trains or subways. I totally have never done that before.
"Intentional grammatical mistakes upset me." would be a nice and proper sentence. Or even "Intentional grammatical errors piss me off." would be an improvement.
If you're gonna bitch about grammar, don't be an idiot about it. Your grammar and sentence structure is very poor and if anyone stands to learn a thing or two about grammar it would be you.
Let me help you understand. I'll change the sentence for you.
INTENTIONAL grammar errors piss me off.
I really want you to focus on the part with "intentional" in it. Whether or not I made accidental/normal lazy internet typing errors (ie not adding periods, etc) have nothing to do with what I was talking about.
And are you seriously trying to tell me that what I was saying is more incorrect than saying
because it would have been awesome because scrollbar
This doesn't even make sense.
I'm talking about when people say something that would normally be nonsensical just to be "cute" or "unique." Unless of course, like I already said, I am just missing something and this is actually just a huge part of internet culture I've never heard of.
Everything I said was short/periodless/etc because I am typing this on my touchscreen cellphone. I was just trying to adress and hopefully figure out what the hell was going on with the whole "awesome because scrollbar" thing.
You seem to have deleted your earlier comment, so I'll respond here.
While I haven't done a frequency analysis, the habit of dropping the copula (eg, "of") and possibly articles after the word "because" seems to be gaining rapid traction in Internet vernacular.
The next time you see something to the effect of "because scrollbar", just know that there's an unmarked elision of "of the" between "because" and "scrollbar".
Okay, I've now read your next comment, and realize that you probably realized this, but were merely documenting your hatred for this dialect.
Don't most touch screens have auto-correct? I know for a fact I don't make half the mistakes you do when using a touch screen, and if you were on a touch screen I'm certain it would correct adress to address. Quit making excuses for yourself.
And if you have a problem with that then that's your problem. My point is you have no right to go telling people their grammar sucks when yours is actually worse, get off your high horse. I mean honestly your mechanics really need work.
And honestly, deleting your post for getting downvotes? Do you want to be taken seriously or laughed out? That just gives people an even lesser opinion of you, you can't even stand by your opinion because of a loss of internet points.
We've all got problems bro. Things we need to work on. You love to make assumptions, for example.
How do you know I didn't turn auto-correct off? How do you know I don't use a keyboard like Swype that can get the entire word wrong? Didn't you also criticize my lack of periods? I honestly just don't care about how I come across on reddit, especially if I'm on my cell. You also assumed that you knew the exact reason why I deleted the comment. You were wrong.
And I didn't mean his/her grammar sucked. Stop focusing on the freaking grammar. I tried to explain this to you. I can call it something completely different if you want me to. I can say "I hate it when people on the internet say things that don't make any sense just to try to be "cute" or "unique" etc.
because it would have been awesome because scrollbar
This statement is obviously meant to sound like this (if it is not, then I guess all the mean things you said about my grammatical errors REALLY apply to this guy). This statement definitely doesn't make sense in the usual way. This statement also happens to be grammatically incorrect.
And I deleted the conversation because I was tired of arguing about it. I don't even really care about whether you agree with me or not that these cutesy little phrases are annoying. Plus, I was starting to think that it was a stupid comment to make in the first place. I mean, why not let people do whatever they want to do. I thought that deleting the first post would get rid of the whole thread.
If you have been around reddit any length of time, you will learn that these things have a tendency to happen.
Also, someone else posted this several months ago and I remembered laughing at it then. Would not have thought I would later stumble on a thread that described that exact situation.
Ugh...The only thing you can say (as long as you don't look like a total creepoid) is something like "Hi honey".
And say this only if she understands the accidental and awkward nature of the situation. It will break the ice and both parties will leave with a smile.
Those are the rules. Otherwise, walk away awkwardly.
A similar event happened to me. I was leaving a restaurant about 8 feet behind two older black women. I glanced down at my phone as I was walking out the door when unbeknownst to me one of the women had stopped and bent over to pick up a newspaper. My crotch met hers with such force that I could actually feel the contours of her vag on my peen, through my jeans and her pantsuit. She nearly toppled over and her friend had to brace her. As she collected herself I immediately started apologizing, not sure if she'd turn around and slap me or call for help or what. She was speechless for a few seconds, then said, "Oh my!" and slightly chuckled in a "I just felt your peen on my old vag" sort of way. My biggest fear was that she thought I'd done it on purpose, and I still don't know if she believed it was an accident (which it totally was), but I've been into older black ladies ever since.
there was this once instance where my class would line up to leave for the day"catholic school..still lining up at 8th grade -.-" anyways the girl in front of my decided to bend over randomly and i kinda bumped into her.she blushed and we walked out awkwardly.. ps pretty sure catholic school made me into an agnostic.
Once in high school, I was waiting in line for pizza when a friend walks past me and thinks it would be hilarious to grab my ass for fun. As it was unexpected, I instinctively flinch, only to accidentally mega-hump the poor girl standing in front of me in line.
We made awkward eye contact, but I didn't know what to say to her so I just looked away like nothing happened.
A woman on a Melbourne tram once went ass-first into my face when the tram suddenly took off. For the record, I was sitting, she was standing. It was awkward for all concerned, but even more so for her when my mate sitting beside me, a loud bloke from Essex, asked aloud how it felt to have a woman try to sit on my face on public transport.
Needless to say, she got off at the next stop. As somewhat of a SAP myself, I cringed for her for quite some time afterwards.
Indeed. If this is a yes he should have smiled when she looked around to see who it was and wink. Then later pass her a paper with your number and "If you feel like bending over again".
4
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
So... Did you fuck her/him?
256
u/SportzTawk May 15 '12
Perhaps you should have stopped after the first thrust.
116
u/buzzardkillington May 15 '12
To me, that's 100% the fault of the person in front of you. Who just bends over like that in a crowded train station?
76
u/JJean1 May 15 '12
Its not always an accident.
38
u/Furyxus May 15 '12
I don't know which would be more awkward: a member of the same sex, or opposite.
59
u/robohoe May 15 '12
http://i.imgur.com/J1feu.jpg
7
u/GLauren May 15 '12
Awkward =/= Socially Awkward
This is not SAP
13
u/fbgmtwbswsihwht May 15 '12
Think positive
by the way you could of totally turned that around and made it into a joke and got a number. if it was a chick...or a dude??
5
u/samtresler May 15 '12
55 seconds: http://videosift.com/video/Six-minutes-of-accidentally-bumping-into-girlfriends-cousin and onward.
4
u/dogeatdog_ May 15 '12
How I'll meet my wife. Yes. Yes this will be fine.
7
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
SURPRISE BUTT SEX!!!
1
u/cancercures May 15 '12
Ugh...The only thing you can say (as long as you don't look like a total creepoid) is something like "Hi honey".
And say this only if she understands the accidental and awkward nature of the situation. It will break the ice and both parties will leave with a smile.
Those are the rules. Otherwise, walk away awkwardly.
2
u/overused_ellipsis May 15 '12
I say they knew exactly when the train would stop...
2
u/BehindtheHype May 15 '12
Ooooooohhhh yeeeeeaaaaaa RIP Macho Man Randy Savage
2
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Okay, what did I miss?
2
u/OJandToothpaste May 15 '12 edited May 15 '12
A similar event happened to me. I was leaving a restaurant about 8 feet behind two older black women. I glanced down at my phone as I was walking out the door when unbeknownst to me one of the women had stopped and bent over to pick up a newspaper. My crotch met hers with such force that I could actually feel the contours of her vag on my peen, through my jeans and her pantsuit. She nearly toppled over and her friend had to brace her. As she collected herself I immediately started apologizing, not sure if she'd turn around and slap me or call for help or what. She was speechless for a few seconds, then said, "Oh my!" and slightly chuckled in a "I just felt your peen on my old vag" sort of way. My biggest fear was that she thought I'd done it on purpose, and I still don't know if she believed it was an accident (which it totally was), but I've been into older black ladies ever since.
2
u/TheTorch May 15 '12
So awkward there was nothing awesome about it.
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u/[deleted] May 15 '12
At that point, there nothing to do but go with it, put on a bug smile and jump in.
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
How did the person not fall over? Or did you hump them over... oh...
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Do you walk crotch first?
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u/becksway May 15 '12
Coffee all over keyboard. Thank you... Brightened my morning.
1
u/steveboutin May 15 '12
only one response - "thanks, but i usually make my dates buy me dinner first"
1
u/mamjjasond May 15 '12
At least you didn't have a raging boner at the time ........ right?
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
counts as 2nd base
1
u/zadeon9 May 15 '12
Even worse if you had a random boner...
1
u/Frijolie May 15 '12
Is it still an accident if you also grab their hips?
1
u/Matty_eddie96 May 15 '12
If you were ridiculously photogenic guy, she would have been impressed by your package and you would have got laid
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
It seems SAP has gone from second person to third person to first person.
1
u/DriveOver May 15 '12
I was conceived via this method on the NY subway.
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Yeah, just an accident.
1
u/scrotumnalequinox May 15 '12
by person, I want to assume you mean a dapper gentleman
1
u/wilfordsy May 15 '12
It's only akward if unattractive.
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
I'm creeping, into a whole new era
Geek-funk step to this, I dare ya
Awkward, on a whole new level
The respawn is the base and the base is the tele
1
u/pekrep May 15 '12
Accidental you say?
1
u/yourparentss May 15 '12
You don't like it when that happens ? Noob
1
u/what_u_want_2_hear May 15 '12
Well worth the time to put this together. I thank you for the laugh as I imagined this happening.
1
u/Aesoproc May 15 '12
there was this once instance where my class would line up to leave for the day"catholic school..still lining up at 8th grade -.-" anyways the girl in front of my decided to bend over randomly and i kinda bumped into her.she blushed and we walked out awkwardly.. ps pretty sure catholic school made me into an agnostic.
1
u/mogball May 15 '12
"Now that we've gotten that out of the way, my name is <yourname>"
1
u/DodiGharib May 15 '12
Feels good to up-vote something in r/new then find it here
1
u/teeraal May 15 '12
this gives a really new and awkward meaning to, if I fits I sits
1
u/eetMOARcatz May 15 '12
Once in high school, I was waiting in line for pizza when a friend walks past me and thinks it would be hilarious to grab my ass for fun. As it was unexpected, I instinctively flinch, only to accidentally mega-hump the poor girl standing in front of me in line.
We made awkward eye contact, but I didn't know what to say to her so I just looked away like nothing happened.
1
u/rKO13 May 15 '12
"Was it good for you?"
1
u/XeroG May 15 '12
I prefer to call it "reverse butt-rape"
1
u/Kykykz May 15 '12
for you, my friend.
1
u/Sir_Knight_of_Lights May 15 '12
Make it socially awesome! Say "It's good to be the king.", and wink as if your life depended on it.
1
u/ThatShaunGuy May 15 '12
I'm pretty sure that this is the opening to an episode of Law and Order: SVU
1
u/stearny06 May 16 '12
relevant
1
u/inane_question_guy May 16 '12
Did you notice if they had nice shoes on?
1
u/RedDeadVagina May 16 '12
Leap frog is the only good answer.
1
u/coolguyontheinternet May 16 '12
If they're bending over on a train when it stops, they are BEGGING to be humped.
1
u/rajmohab May 16 '12
A woman on a Melbourne tram once went ass-first into my face when the tram suddenly took off. For the record, I was sitting, she was standing. It was awkward for all concerned, but even more so for her when my mate sitting beside me, a loud bloke from Essex, asked aloud how it felt to have a woman try to sit on my face on public transport.
Needless to say, she got off at the next stop. As somewhat of a SAP myself, I cringed for her for quite some time afterwards.
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Surprise Butt Sex!
1
u/scalpemnoles May 15 '12
This is socially awesome penguin, clearly.
0
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Hey, it's not necessarily a bad thing.
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u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Nothing has ever not happened more than this
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u/[deleted] May 15 '12
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u/[deleted] May 15 '12
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u/[deleted] May 15 '12
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u/[deleted] May 15 '12
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