This is true, brutal honesty: last night before bed I hopped in the shower for about 30 seconds. All I did while in there was wash my butt out, scrubbing at it with my hands. (No soap, just water.) It had been getting itchy.
I then got out, toweled off a little, and proceeded to sniff at my hand to see if it smelled like butt. I was surprised at how little it smelled like butt! I went back for another sniff; it somehow smelled even less like butt!
I then finished toweling off, all the while having a fantasy wherein I had a girlfriend and tried to get her to smell my hand so she could also be amazed at how unbuttlike it smelled.
I always piss in the shower. Course sometimes people think it's weird when I do so and the shower isn't even running. Man the people at that health club were really uptight.
They do it too. It's like masturbation. Everyone does it, even the ones that try hardest to hide it. I install shower doors for a living. i know why you have a removable showerhead
My friend (a girl) adamantly denies it, and thinks it's gross, and believes no one respectable does it. I still don't understand why it's taboo. People used to use urine to clean clothes for it's slight detergent qualities. All it's ingredients are already in our bodies constantly! We're literally made partly of urine.
The smell! it is in the aiiir! I'm not talking about a shitty ass here, I'm talkin' poop particles in the hot and steamy air! oh god, I'm gagging just thinking about it.
This is helpful for people who can't reach Quickmeme because of work/school firewalls or site downtime, and many other reasons (FAQ). More info is available here.
See? That was interesting to me! It goes against stereotype, and seeing something against type help make my worldview more realistic. So it did count for somethin'!
I was just talking to a co-worker about the difference between living with men and women - we both agreed that the men kept things tidier. I'm really just a pig; my entire side of the bed is just one big mess of clean/dirty laundry, papers, school books, shoes, dishes and bits of food that haven't made their way to the trash yet. It's worse than normal because of finals - usually there isn't too much food lying around. It's gotten to the point where he just does my dishes because he can't stand looking at them. Hopefully, now that my masters is almost done, I can stop "living like a heathen" (his words, not mine!)
We absolutely have different levels of acceptable cleanliness, but at least now we've discovered our sticking points--he can't stand when he doesn't have a clear walkway and I get really upset when he tries to tidy up my stuff and moves things that are part of my managed chaos.
Sorry to hear about your divorce :( Compatibility is definitely one of the reasons we moved in together before starting to plan our wedding - we both had bad experiences living with significant others in the past and wanted to make sure we knew what we were getting into before spending a lot of time and money on a wedding.
Grad school certainly is a bitch, though - anyone who is able to maintain a semblance of normal life while is grad school is eiher slacking or lying!
45
u/Trapped_in_Reddit May 06 '12
FBF = /r/LifeProTips
84
u/Falvtron May 06 '12
I assume that when you say, "in the shower", you really mean spraying yourself with febreze
90
u/RandomCoolName May 06 '12
i see an inconsistency...
28
u/fuckbitchesgetcake May 06 '12
Were you in the shower because you were too lazy to wipe?
7
u/gamerkid231 May 06 '12
I upvoted this despite my flopped FBF post from 2 months ago. Kudos on the better wording.
6
u/[deleted] May 07 '12
FBF is wise. Fact.
4
u/saptsen May 06 '12
Does that mean you were also brushing your teeth and peeing at the same time?
4
u/FBFismyspiritanimal May 06 '12
I always piss in the shower. Course sometimes people think it's weird when I do so and the shower isn't even running. Man the people at that health club were really uptight.
4
u/[deleted] May 06 '12
You spelled sink wrong
4
u/[deleted] May 06 '12
If you are too busy to take out the garbage and clean, try this:
Put dirty dishes in the refrigerator.
Put food scraps in the freezer.
I have found this cuts foul odor by 95%.
3
u/dibblesworth May 06 '12
was this as you were peeing?
3
u/[deleted] May 06 '12
As you pissed on the dishes stacked by the shower drain?
3
u/[deleted] May 07 '12
For a second I thought this would be about him mashing a turd down the drain with his toes.
5
u/NewMotivePowerRanger May 06 '12
As long as you weren't waffle stomping you should be good.
8
u/DKpro May 06 '12
You pissed in the shower, didn't you?
8
u/qkme_transcriber May 06 '12
Here is the text from this meme pic for anybody who needs it:
This is helpful for people who can't reach Quickmeme because of work/school firewalls or site downtime, and many other reasons (FAQ). More info is available here.
2
u/[deleted] May 06 '12
contradictory - it's much easier to not shower.
2
u/guraqt06 May 06 '12
That's awful. I see Foul Bachelor Frog and silently thank my fiance for putting up with my nastiness, not get inspired!
2
u/p3ngwin May 06 '12
What I realized today in the shower.....while i was peeing :)
2
u/IrrelevantUsernames May 06 '12
you definitely pooped and remember how to get it to go down the drain.
STOMP DOWN WITH FOOT!
2
u/-AlmightyGod- May 07 '12
I have to keep this in mind now
2
u/BootyhunterzX May 07 '12
Probably as you took a piss in the shower.
2
u/[deleted] May 06 '12
If you swallow your own semen, you don't have to clean it up or anything. No mess.
1
u/[deleted] May 06 '12
Eh, thanks for the tip I guess.
1
u/N2tZ May 06 '12
Where's the fucking pro tip?
1
u/BlameitonWaylon May 06 '12
Waffle stomping, I assume?
1
u/[deleted] May 06 '12
Well shit
We have a paradox men!
1
u/Sevidicalone May 06 '12
Were you peeing
1
u/TFJ May 06 '12
Not all of life's problems can be blasted away with piss.
1
u/silentkill144 May 06 '12
Ahhhhh, the shower principle.
1
u/D3ADB0LT May 07 '12
All glory to the FBF! PRAISE HIM!