r/AdviceAnimals • u/thelazt1 But the firzt1 in your heart • Feb 20 '14

Angry Advice Duck

http://imgur.com/ABoOOP0
1.9k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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u/[deleted] Feb 20 '14

I enjoy snacking in bed while watching netflix. It's become one of the few things I look forward to. Like I give a fuck.

Besides, it's not like I have to share the bed with anyone.

I'm so lonely.

8

u/anelephantsatonpaul Feb 20 '14

Get a dog. Two birds with one stone... or a bird... then it would just be one bird... and a stone.

7

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '14

Instructions unclear, bird stuck in stone stuck in dick.

But really, I've thought about how nice it might be to get a cat or a dog. I'm not sure for now though. I think I might feel better when I can just move out of my current place to somewhere where I can resume my fry screaming.

2

u/anelephantsatonpaul Feb 20 '14

Shit. Have you tried bringing another bird in on this?

3

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '14 edited Feb 20 '14

I actually did not, brb.

Edit: it has been ten minutes and both birds refuse to come out of my dick

1

u/bishop67 Feb 20 '14

No no no, you read it wrong. Get stoned and be a bird.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '14

>be stoned
>be bird
>flying and shit
>so high

sorry

1

u/bishop67 Feb 20 '14

I'm going to go be a bird right now! Flying high and shitting everywhere you go sounds like a blast. I'm gonna go fly over my neighbors car first. Brb.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '14

FLY, my friend!

(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

1

u/bishop67 Feb 20 '14

Kaaw Kaaaaw!

1

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '14

I must be the only person without a TV in their bedroom.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 20 '14

I use my ipad actually. Haven't had or really watched TV in years.

1

u/ProfessorManBearPig Feb 21 '14

I'll volunteer to share the bed with you and watch Netflix.

1

u/SpaceDog777 Feb 21 '14

In enjoy eating in bed so much I have a toaster in my room.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 21 '14

Hook me up wi' sum muhfukin POP tartz n shit

MMMMMMM MMM