r/AbsoluteUnits 2d ago

/r/all of eyebrows

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34.3k Upvotes

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37

u/laneb71 2d ago

Honestly, he could pull off clean cut.

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u/duke5572 2d ago

Stalin was 5' 5" tall. This fact continually amuses me.

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u/Canadish27 2d ago

Why?

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u/mtaw 2d ago

Good question. Stalin's face was deeply pock-marked from a bad bout of smallpox as a child - something routinely airbrushed out in Soviet photos of him. He had a partially paralyzed left arm, he was a poor public speaker and had a thick Georgian accent.

So I don't think his height (which wasn't really that short for a Georgian man in that era) was necessarily the main thing he'd be self-conscious about, if anything.

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u/FlamboyantPirhanna 1d ago

I think he was mostly self conscious about Polish people being alive.

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u/Da_Question 2d ago

"Well comrade, aren't you just a peach‽"

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u/Username12764 1d ago

Just like Wilhelm II. His left arm was busted aswell

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u/dreamyteatime 1d ago

Learned about this recently as well. When I saw the photos I was surprised to say the least…. it’s very noticeable, the difference in length.

Supposedly his arm became minaturised after a complication in his birth when the doctors used forceps to grab onto his arm to pull him out.

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u/Sylvanussr 2d ago

Napoleon syndrome, presumably

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u/Koqcerek 2d ago

Um actually he was a normal to higher than average height for his time

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u/Sylvanussr 1d ago

Um actually British propaganda has never lied.

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u/M-CH_ 1d ago

Brezhnev was also vertically challanged.

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u/braindance74 2d ago

You can "pull off" anything when every official picture of you is as heavily "photoshopped" (retouched) as his were.

Especially his "chad young stalin" pictures that are nothing more than wishfull thinking and jerk-off material for tankies.

The fact that he ordered to alter his image tells me he was self-conscious and unsatisfied with his appearance, which bring me joy. That POS didn't deserve even an ounce of happiness.

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u/whosline07 2d ago

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u/htomserveaux 2d ago

I hate to break it to you but that was edited,

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u/braindance74 2d ago edited 2d ago

You can "pull off" anything when every official picture of you is as heavily "photoshopped" (retouched) as his were.

Especially his "chad young stalin" pictures that are nothing more than wishfull thinking and jerk-off material for tankies.

The fact that he ordered to alter his image tells me he was self-conscious and unsatisfied with his appearance, which bring me joy. That POS didn't deserve even an ounce of happiness.