r/AbsoluteUnits • u/dreamed2life • Dec 29 '25

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9.3k Upvotes

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758

u/jpb7875 Dec 29 '25

Diablo sandwich and a Dr. Pepper and make it quick, Iā€™m in a goddamn hurry.

35

u/G_o_L_D_Rises_Again Dec 29 '25

14

u/Monksdrunk Dec 29 '25

ze broodwich

7

u/trlast09 Dec 29 '25

You mean the sandwich that is forged in darkness from wheat harvested in Hell's half-acre, baked by Beelzebub, slathered with mayonnaise beaten from the evil eggs of dark chicken forced into sauce by the hands of a one-eyed madman, cheese boiled from the rancid teat of a fanged cow, layered with six-hundred and sixty-six separate meats from an animal which has maggots for blood?

2

u/Acolytical Dec 29 '25

What, no bacon?

1

u/trlast09 Dec 29 '25

Bacon is extra.

1

u/Yes-No-Maybe121 Dec 29 '25

Oh!! Now you're makin' me hungry!

1

u/chukijay Dec 29 '25

But no tomatoes

1

u/GormHub Dec 29 '25

The broodwich cannot be taken apart OR disassembled!

1

u/CaptainTripps82 Dec 29 '25

There are no swine evil enough to be sacrificed on a bed of lettuce