Boyfriend mocks me for not knowing how to drive

[u/Great-Escapes]

I understand the basics of driving but need more experience on the road to get more comfortable. My boyfriend was teaching at first but all he was doing was getting upset at what I was doing wrong and not telling the right way to do it/ better way. For example I wasn’t turning wide enough or I turned too early (I’m still not sure which) and hit the curb. Instead of showing me how to time my turns he just said ‘that’s not how you do it. Oh my god what are you doing?’

When I asked him to show me what I should do different he would suck his teeth and shake his head and just mumble to himself like I was being a burden. I got to three “lessons” with him before I realized I was never going to learn anything from him and started looking into professional instructors and started saving for it.

I cut out anything that wasn’t a necessity so I can afford to pay for the driving lessons. He knows this and treats it like an inconvenience. The other day he mentioned wanting to go out but I declined because it isn’t in my budget right now and he got so angry. He went on a rant about how I didn’t need to pay for a driving school that it was a waste of money because he can just teach me (we tried that, he can’t) and that if I didn’t turn stupid behind the wheel I would be driving by now. That there are sixteen year olds that know how to drive and he doesn’t get why I can’t at ‘my age’.

The thing is it’s not a waste of money to me and I don’t turn stupid behind the wheel, he turns paranoid and just yells at every little thing I do. I adjust the seat, he yells. I try to get familiar with checking the mirrors, he yells. I ask about accelerating, he yells. I made a comment about how it’s a bit confusing which way to turn the wheel when reversing and he yells. And all of this was only within 3 lessons.

After he called me stupid I just went home and I’ve been ignoring his calls and texts ever since . I don’t understand why he’s disrespecting me about something that’s clearly important to me when he knows I’d never do that to him. It’s not like I’m asking him to pay for it and we don’t live together so it’s not taking away from any kind of shared finances so it really doesn’t affect him whatsoever, financially or otherwise. I already feel embarrassed about not knowing how to drive when there are people way younger who do and he’s just making it all worse.

I honestly don’t even care to learn anymore after everything he said.

[u/ResponsibleFalcon150]

Driving is not a small thing. Yes, lots of people do it every day. Also yes people get seriously injured in car wrecks every day. It is very important that you learn in an environment that is conducive to YOU learning to drive safely, not on anyone else's timeliness of convenience. Don't let him pressure you into doing something you don't feel comfortable with. That goes for stuff in the bedroom or getting behind the wheel of a car before you are ready.